Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever - io9 Comments

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

genehuntlover — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 20:00:05 PDT

@BlindKarma:
...Bobby, uh, Bobby I need a little more "black". You know, stick your ass out, pug the eyes, you know how they move...

I guess after all that time, they still wanted it to be more "black", and that's why we got Meteor Man.

genehuntlover

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

BlindKarma — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 19:00:29 PDT

@ceejeemcbeegee (just debatin' not hatin'):
@genehuntlover:

I completely agree with both of you. He was trying to put something positive out there to balance out Boyz N the Hood and all the 90s copycat films that followed.

Hollywood Shuffle is still the best critique/ satire of Hollywood hands down. The Five Heart Beats was probably his only other project I completely dug.

His variety show on Fox was hilarious. He had Biz Markee refereeing a badminton match between MC Hammer and Sinbad.

BlindKarma

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

halloweenjack — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 11:28:59 PDT

I was pretty disappointed in this because I loved Hollywood Shuffle, Townsend's first movie, which was all about how black people don't get decent parts in movies; it's all gangsters and pimps. After that movie did pretty well, Townsend got to do Meteor Man, complete creative control with a dream cast of African-American actors... and it was complete and utter shit. Spy magazine published a blurb about it to the effect that Townsend hired a bunch of his relatives for the movie, and they basically did nothing.

@superbryant88: Mystery Men comes off a lot better on DVD. My theory about cult movies is that most of them have great casts and scripts, but shitty directors that don't pace the material correctly, and that the hidden greatness of the script only comes out upon repeated viewings.

halloweenjack

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

abrahamjoseph — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 10:15:37 PDT

this movie scared the piss out of me as a kid, because i didn't know what gangs were at the time (even though i lived on the border of one of chicago's poorest neighborhoods?). thus, i completely missed the point of the movie. which is underwear-vision.

oh, and at least gorshin still got one last great role (seriously): the grizzled old psychiatrist in 12 monkeys.

abrahamjoseph

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

superbryant88 — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 08:53:03 PDT

Does anybody remember Mystery Men. It came out in 1999.....Now that was a bad movie...lol!

superbryant88

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

PhilipFry — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 06:39:55 PDT

Oh, the stupid, it burns!

People too dumb to shoot someone in his unprotected head. Even by accident.

"Congress voted against money for the public school system." Um . . . [MORBO] CONGRESS DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY![/MORBO]

Frank Gorshin being the best actor in your cast.

Ay yi yi.

PhilipFry

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

Macloserboy — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 06:38:24 PDT

@EBone: Except that he was never a comedian. He was/is a comedic actor. Oh, and on best day of his life was never as funny as David Chapelle. In hindsight it's obviously the bulk of the humor in Hollywood Suffle came from Keenan Ivory Wayans and the pollyanna stuff came from Townsend.

@ceejeemcbeegee (just debatin' not hatin'): We do know what paves the road to hell, yes?

But I will confess, that "vogue off" was funny as hell and probably the best part of the movie.

Macloserboy

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

genehuntlover — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 00:45:51 PDT

@ceejeemcbeegee (just debatin' not hatin'): Indeed.

genehuntlover

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

cde — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 00:08:49 PDT

@Git Em SteveDave: Yea. Biz, and B-Real. And even ashy larry. I'm glad someone else saw them too :D

cde

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

underhill — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 00:08:27 PDT

It still boggles me that Cypress Hill agreed to star in this retina scratch of a film.

I think the film was sold as a movie where African-American kids could finally have a hero to look up to. Alas, if my memory serves me correct, it's Cypress Hill who turn up at the end to provide Meteorman with much needed support. That's Cypress Hill. Cypress Hill who keep the Dutch cannabis industry afloat.

underhill

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

aosagi — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 23:33:46 PDT

I enjoyed this when I was very young

aosagi

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

ceejeemcbeegee (AKA!) — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 21:11:21 PDT

@genehuntlover: That's like the Tyler Perry Paradox: He's a Black man producing money-making movies about Black people... but they are utter crap.

ceejeemcbeegee (AKA!)

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

Git Em SteveDave — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 20:38:01 PDT

OK, was that Biz Marke in the crack house scene, the guy from Cypress Hill in the shoot out, and Wesley Snipes in the crackhouse aftermath? Did Townsend have dirt on all of these people, or did he have A LOT of money to spread around? Also, I liked Griffen's "Janice" lines. Reminded me of his "Janet" lines from "The New Guy". You lookin' at my Janet?

Git Em SteveDave

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

Zapp Brannigan's Girdle — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 20:31:22 PDT

I think the reason Meteor Man had so many superpowers is that he was scooping them all up so that Blankman wouldn't have any.

Zapp Brannigan's Girdle

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

Git Em SteveDave — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 20:29:27 PDT

@darundal: Which was a PG version of the nekkid chicks in New Jack City(?).

Git Em SteveDave

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

LionelAgamedes — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 19:45:38 PDT

Comment on Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever I really enjoyed watching this as a kid in elementary school. It was a great family movie, this and House Guest.

LionelAgamedes

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

darundal — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 19:35:30 PDT

When he is shutting down the crackhouse, he isn't seeing through their clothes, they are just only wearing underwear.

darundal

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

botanicidal — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 19:09:38 PDT

This movie provides direct evidence as to why any superhero film involving a superhero who dons a suit composed of foam pectoral and abdominal muscle pads will always uberfail.

botanicidal

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

CapeMonkey — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 18:29:34 PDT

Meteor Man meeting Spider-man, isn't THAT exciting; everybody who had a Marvel Comics back then met Spider-man. Ren & Stimpy met Spider-man. Seriously. [www.comics.org]

(And as an aside: the writer for that is Dan Slott, one of the current Spider-man writers; I wonder if they'll reprint THAT along with Brand New Day...)

CapeMonkey

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

genehuntlover — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 18:19:08 PDT

3 questions.
1. To be or not to be?
2. Is it better to burn out, than fade away?
3. Who is the better African-American male role model: Meteor Man or Shaft (Remember, I mean Positive and Constructive when I say role Model)?

genehuntlover

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

Sharpless — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 17:34:04 PDT

I feel like less of a human being, having watched that footage.

Sharpless

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

smcallah — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:45:45 PDT

I tolerate this movie only because of the scene where he's first seeing and hearing through walls and watches a man tell his children they should not have hooked up that "Hindendoo" to his TV set.

smcallah

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

animagnum — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:36:09 PDT

I remember really enjoying this movie as a kid. I dunno, I guess my bar for entertainment is fairly low.

animagnum

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

Bluecell — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:26:22 PDT

I haven't seen this movie in years and the only thing I remember from it is his ability to know everything in a book just by touching the cover.

As a kid, everytime I had a test I wished I had that power. I probably should have studied more.

Bluecell

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

ceejeemcbeegee (AKA!) — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:24:28 PDT

Awww... Townsend's heart was in the right place. And I know for a fact this movie helped pave the way for DC/Milestone.

Le sigh. I miss Icon.

ceejeemcbeegee (AKA!)

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

Garrison Dean, King Awesome — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:22:17 PDT

At least they tried to be funny, unlike Steel.

Garrison Dean, King Awesome

Meteor Man: Biggest Waste Of Talent Ever

Grey_Area — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 16:02:06 PDT

Oh Grodd, that was a horrible flick. Comic book inspired movies should only be made by people who respect or at least have read comic books. And yeah, "Blankman" was even worse.

Grey_Area